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Candace Plattor, M.A.Registered Clinical Counsellor
Candace Plattor, M.A.
Registered Clinical Counsellor
If nothing ever changed, there would be no butterflies.

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I’m looking for help dealing with self-centredness

  My husband has been clean & sober for 20 years. I’m looking for help on dealing with addictive behaviours and self-centredness. I can’t find anything that is more about life after active addiction. Do you have something or can you recommend anything? MJ Hi MJ, What a great question! I think the same tools are important in recovery that were used when dealing with someone in active addiction: no enabling, only helping behaviours; healthy, self-respectful boundaries and … [Read more...] about I’m looking for help dealing with self-centredness

Filed Under: Ask Candace Tagged With: Addiction and Codependency, Healthy self-care, Helping vs. Enabling

My Partner Smokes Pot in the Car While Driving

My partner smokes pot while he’s driving. I know pot is legal where we live but I also know that his driving sometimes isn’t very good when he’s under the influence. He does this while he’s driving to work – which isn’t that far away from where we live – so that means he’s under the influence when he gets to work. He has a job in the construction industry so it concerns me that he’s not always in his right mind while he’s doing things like mixing and pouring concrete, etc. What if he makes some … [Read more...] about My Partner Smokes Pot in the Car While Driving

Filed Under: Ask Candace Tagged With: Addiction, Addiction recovery, smoking pot while driving, working while impaired

Overdosing on the Job? Naloxone to the Rescue! Part Two

Enabling vs. Helping My simple definition of enabling is when we do for others what they can – and indeed should – be doing for themselves. In my view, what’s happening on some of these worksites is enabling at its worst. At a deeper level, addicts know exactly what they’re doing – they know they’re crippling their own lives and continually hurting the people who love them. Show me an addict who doesn’t know that they now risk dying every time they use because of the toxic supply, and I’ll show … [Read more...] about Overdosing on the Job? Naloxone to the Rescue! Part Two

Filed Under: Addiction, Helping vs. Enabling Tagged With: Addiction, Addiction and Codependency, Addiction in the family, Addiction recovery, Helping vs. Enabling

Is it advisable to provide a relative with her own apartment?

Good Day Candace, I need to know if it is advisable to provide a relative with her own apartment? She is still an active user. She is homeless. My thinking is to purchase a small apartment destined to be for my daughter to live in. The apartment will be in my name and I will write in my will that when I die that apartment is to be transferred to my daughter's name. What would you advise? Your input is much appreciated. Mariamanda Hi Mariamanda, This is a great question! While I think … [Read more...] about Is it advisable to provide a relative with her own apartment?

Filed Under: Ask Candace Tagged With: Addiction, Addiction and Codependency, Helping vs. Enabling

Self-Care and Selfishness are NOT The Same Thing

  When we are taking good care of ourselves and others in our lives accuse us of being “selfish,” that could be because they want us to keep catering to their needs instead of our own. Be careful not to buy into that way of thinking.  Self-Care and Selfishness are two very different things. … [Read more...] about Self-Care and Selfishness are NOT The Same Thing

Filed Under: Healthy self-care Tagged With: Addiction, Addiction and Codependency, Addiction recovery, Healthy self-care, Helping vs. Enabling, Setting boundaries with addicted loved ones

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Recent Posts

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TEDxBearCreekPark talk: How to Love with Boundaries

TEDxBearCreekPark talk:
How to Love with Boundaries

Candace Plattor speaking at TEDx

If nothing ever changed

“If nothing ever changed, there would be no butterflies.”

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