One of the constants of life is that we teach other people how to treat us. When we don’t speak our truth and stand up for ourselves, we make it easy for others to steamroll over us. If you’re finding this happening more often than you’d like in your life, it’s important to first look at what you’re allowing, before blaming anyone else.
Okay, okay, I know – we all saw the Oscars. And if we didn’t, we’ve certainly all heard about that slap heard around the world. People are still talking about it, several weeks later. There has been much said about what happened, from a ton of different angles – including Will Smith’s 10-year punishment. But not very much has been said about WHY it really happened. How did it get to this? What really made Will Smith do this, and why did he do it to Chris Rock?
I believe there’s some really fascinating underlying scoop, from a psychological perspective, that hasn’t been talked about nearly enough. Allow me to shine some light.
Most of us now know some of the deeper facts: Jada Pinkett Smith has alopecia, and after several emotionally devastating experiences of hair loss, she made the choice to keep her hair extremely short. Alopecia is an autoimmune disease that can be difficult and embarrassing, especially for women. Having an autoimmune condition myself, which can also be difficult and embarrassing (Crohn’s Disease), I can well understand how it might have felt for her to have been the butt of the GI Jane joke. Many of us have watched Chris Rock’s shtick – he insults people for a living and not only does he get away with it, but he also gets quite wealthy doing it.
That in itself is a fascinating situation in our society. [Read more…]
We all know how rampant addiction has become – we see it all around us and hear about it in our news nearly every day. Mostly, our society focuses on mind-altering addiction, consisting of drugs and alcohol. There are also many other kinds of mood-altering or process addictions, which are more behavioural in nature such as gambling, smoking, overspending, eating disorders, and sex addiction of various types.
Millions of families all over the world are grappling with some sort of addiction these days – and most of them have no idea how to find or access any help.
And even though there is plenty of help available to people who are addicted, there is still very little assistance or counselling for their loved ones. When there is addiction in a family, everyone is affected and everyone needs to heal – otherwise, the addiction just continues to hold everybody emotionally hostage.
So – how is a family supposed to find the skilled, experienced, and compassionate help they so desperately need? This article is intended to be a guide for you, if you are being run ragged by your loved one’s addiction. [Read more…]
I don’t know about you, but 2021 went by quickly for me – and here we are again, almost at Valentine’s Day. In my past, as a brutally self-trashing codependent woman, this was always one of my least favourite days – because I was either in a dysfunctional relationship or I was alone and lonely, wishing desperately that I was partnered with someone – anyone.
Either way, the approach of Valentine’s Day didn’t bode well for me. [Read more…]
When you love someone who is still in active addiction, it’s easy to become emotionally enmeshed in all of their ongoing chaos and drama. Here is a simple gauge you can use for your own self-assessment.
