There’s nothing wrong with doing something for someone we care about, as long as what we’re doing isn’t enabling that person to stay stuck in addiction. When we do that, our self-respect takes a hit, and we feel this inside. It’s important to ask ourselves this question: Am I trying to ‘rescue’ someone so that I can feel better, or am I wanting to help them feel their own resiliency as they learn how to do things for themselves? … [Read more...] about Are you able to put your own needs first?
Addiction recovery
Are You Stuck in Your Comfort Zone?
I love the saying “Life begins at the end of your comfort zone” because until we can allow ourselves to feel the discomfort of healthy change, we will continue to choose to keep ourselves stuck. The reason we people-please is to try to keep discomfort at bay. But when we can instead learn how to handle difficult emotions and begin to learn how to use them in positive ways – learning their lessons – we can then become much more authentic and life becomes much easier. … [Read more...] about Are You Stuck in Your Comfort Zone?
Should We Pay Our Addicted Daughter’s Rent?
My daughter has been addicted to alcohol since she was 15. My husband and I thought it was just a phase she would grow out of, but she is now 27 and her life is a total mess. We have tried to help her in every way we could think of, but nothing seems to be working. If we don’t continue to pay her rent (which is a financial hardship for us, after so many years), I’m worried she will be out on the street with nowhere to go. My husband thinks we should do this, but I just can’t bring myself to see … [Read more...] about Should We Pay Our Addicted Daughter’s Rent?
Be Gentle with Yourself
Anyone who is in a relationship with a practicing addict knows that there can be unexpected pitfalls around any corner. As we start picking up the pieces of our own lives, it’s important to be gentle and patient with ourselves. … [Read more...] about Be Gentle with Yourself
Trust Your Inner Guidance
We all have what I like to call an “inner GPS” that tells us when we are on track and when we aren’t. We can know this by the way we feel inside. It’s important for us to listen to this inner voice so that we can build up both our self-trust and our self-respect. … [Read more...] about Trust Your Inner Guidance