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Candace Plattor, M.A.Registered Clinical Counsellor
Candace Plattor, M.A.
Registered Clinical Counsellor
If nothing ever changed, there would be no butterflies.

asking for help when loving an addict

How to Talk with a Loved One Who Denies They Are Addicted

Laurie asks, what do you do when someone you love is addicted and abusing drugs, but when you try to talk to them about it, they continuously deny it. How do I help them when they won't be honest with me? Hi Laurie, This is a common situation. You know that somebody is using, you know that they're in active addiction, you know that you've seen the signs—they've changed right before your eyes. But when you try to talk to them, they tell you they don't have a problem. What we need to … [Read more...] about How to Talk with a Loved One Who Denies They Are Addicted

Filed Under: Ask Candace Tagged With: Addiction, Addiction and Codependency, Addiction in the family, Addiction recovery, asking for help when loving an addict, Helping vs. Enabling, Setting boundaries with addicted loved ones

It’s Okay to Ask for Help!

There is a wonderful saying that tells us “Our secrets keep us sick.”  Many loved ones of addicts don’t talk about their struggles or reach out for help because of the shame they feel for being in this situation.  But until we ask for and receive the help we need, we don’t learn how to do things differently. Recovery begins with self-awareness and with the willingness to ask for assistance when we need it. … [Read more...] about It’s Okay to Ask for Help!

Filed Under: Addiction recovery Tagged With: Addiction, Addiction in the family, Addiction recovery, asking for help when loving an addict, Helping vs. Enabling, loving an addict, Recovery from addiction

All Change Begins with Self-Awareness

Emotional maturity is what we develop when we take the time to know ourselves more deeply. When we aren’t self-aware in a problematic situation, many of us will reach for a drug or a drink – or some other kind of addictive behaviour. In my experience, I’ve found that it’s actually easier to do the inner work it takes to live with self-awareness and self-respect, rather than to stay stuck in addiction.  Please reach out for help doing this, whenever you need it – although we each need to do our … [Read more...] about All Change Begins with Self-Awareness

Filed Under: Addiction in the Family Tagged With: Addiction, Addiction and Codependency, Addiction in the family, Addiction recovery, asking for help when loving an addict, Self-awareness, Setting boundaries with addicted loved ones

The Important Downside of “Powerlessness”

The only reason that millions of us are in recovery from addiction is because we have made the CHOICE, over and over again, one day at a time, to be in recovery. If that wasn’t the case, those of us who are in recovery would still be in active addiction – or we would have died from our addiction. Recovery is a choice, plain and simple. … [Read more...] about The Important Downside of “Powerlessness”

Filed Under: Addiction recovery Tagged With: Addiction recovery, asking for help when loving an addict, Helping vs. Enabling, Recovery from addiction

Addiction Is a Progressive Condition

Janet A. asks: Our 37-year-old son began smoking pot in his teens but is now using dangerous drugs like fentanyl on a daily basis. My husband and I have been trying to get him to stop, probably enabling him, but we’re not on the same page in the ways we think we should help him, and nothing is working. His brother and sisters are very worried too. Help? Hi Janet, I’m so glad you wrote to me about this. You’ve mentioned some really important things in your short question – thank you for … [Read more...] about Addiction Is a Progressive Condition

Filed Under: Ask Candace Tagged With: Addiction, Addiction in the family, asking for help when loving an addict, Helping vs. Enabling

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Recent Posts

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  • Assertiveness

TEDxBearCreekPark talk: How to Love with Boundaries

TEDxBearCreekPark talk:
How to Love with Boundaries

Candace Plattor speaking at TEDx

If nothing ever changed

“If nothing ever changed, there would be no butterflies.”

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