It’s important to be able to distinguish between unhealthy messages you may be giving the addict in your life (enabling) and healthier messages (helping). Otherwise, we can run the risk of keeping the addicts we love stuck in their addiction. … [Read more...] about How to Support Your Addict in Healthy Ways
Addiction and Codependency
Allowing Discomfort: The Secret to Successful Recovery From Addictive Behaviours Challenging Your “Yeah But’s…”
You've given it a lot of thought. You know that your addiction is overwhelming your life and causing you a lot of problems. You really want to stop engaging in these self-defeating behaviours and have a better life. You're so sure you're ready, but… "It's going to be so hard!" you tell yourself. "How am I going to get through the rough times without having that substance or behaviour to fall back on?" The truth is, you're right! It will be difficult. When we have been soothing ourselves with … [Read more...] about Allowing Discomfort: The Secret to Successful Recovery From Addictive Behaviours Challenging Your “Yeah But’s…”
Recovery from Codependency: Self-Awareness Is the Key
Here we all are, drawing closer to leaving 2021 behind and beginning a new year. These past 12 months have been momentous in so many ways – and I know that you don’t need me to go into much detail about that. For some of us, this year that’s ending has included much loss and grieving – of people we loved, of businesses and jobs that evaporated because of Covid-19 and other factors. For other people, there were opportunities for growth and well-being – with all kinds of shades of grey in between … [Read more...] about Recovery from Codependency: Self-Awareness Is the Key
Dealing with Conflict When You Love an Addict
If you love an addict who is in active addiction, you are likely experiencing passivity and aggression from them – usually in a back-and-forth manner. They can go from hiding out quietly in their rooms to loudly demanding what they want in an entitled way – and they can make that shift very quickly. If you are codependent with them, giving in so that you can avoid conflict, you may never know when the next shoe will drop – when the next aggressive, entitled demand may come your way. But once … [Read more...] about Dealing with Conflict When You Love an Addict
A New Way to Understand Addiction
There are many schools of thought about addiction and what it really is. Some people consider it to be a physical disease, while others credit genetic predisposition while also addressing the nature/nurture paradigm. Even if some or all ring true for each of us, what I know to be true—as an addict in recovery for nearly 33 years, as a loved one of addicts, and as a professional addiction therapist for three decades—is that underneath all of this, staying in active addiction is a choice. And … [Read more...] about A New Way to Understand Addiction
