T.C. Asks: How do you stay firm in your decision to want out of a relationship with an addict who has an it’s-only-on-weekends-I-can-control-it attitude? I have been doing this for 27 years and I don't know how to make this individual understand a weekend is not only a weekend, it’s sending them back into addiction. I have grown tired, and because this individual works every day and doesn't spend money on their habits, I am supposed to ignore the concerns for their health, etc. Hi … [Read more...] about How do I stay firm in my decision with an addict?
Ask Candace
How likely is it someone will relapse if they have several years clean and sober?
M.R. asks: I’ve heard that relapse is a “normal” part of recovery. Is that true? How likely is it that someone will relapse if they have several years clean and sober? *** Hi M.R., It’s more unlikely that people with a number of consecutive years in recovery will relapse, compared with people who are in early recovery and have a year or less clean and sober. That’s because the longer a person remains abstinent from the mind-altering substances or mood-altering behaviours that they used before … [Read more...] about How likely is it someone will relapse if they have several years clean and sober?
Is it okay for a drug addict in recovery to drink?
Joanne asks: My sister has had problems with addiction on and off for about 5 years. She’s been to a couple of rehabs, and she has been clean now for about 6 months. We’re all very proud of her but we’re also worried. She was mostly using cocaine and pills, and because she wasn’t much of a drinker she now thinks it’s okay for her to drink socially since it wasn’t her “drug of choice.” Is it okay for a drug addict in recovery to drink? *** Hi Joanne, This is a great question that many family … [Read more...] about Is it okay for a drug addict in recovery to drink?
A sibling who relapses after rehab
Annie G asks: My sister has been having trouble with alcohol for about 4 years now. We‘ve sent her to rehab twice but she relapsed both times. My parents have been keeping her afloat financially for many years – which I don’t understand because she works full time and has enough money to buy her alcohol. That really makes me mad! About 3 months ago, she married a guy she barely knew when they went to Vegas together and even though he knows she’s a problem drinker (at the very least), he … [Read more...] about A sibling who relapses after rehab
How do I know when it’s time to say “I’m done!” with an addict?
Anonymous asks: My sister has been an addict for over 10 years – how do I know when it’s time to slam the door and say “I’m done!” Hi Anonymous, The truth is that only you will know when that time has come. When we’ve been putting up with the bad behaviours associated with active addiction, there is an ending point for many people. That being said, it’s also possible that if you try some different responses with your sister, you might find that she responds differently to you too. For … [Read more...] about How do I know when it’s time to say “I’m done!” with an addict?
