I am a firm believer that we teach other people how to treat us.The way people treat us generally has its roots in the way we treat ourselves as well as how we decide to show up in the world. Are we assertive and clear with our boundaries, or do we allow other people to push us around? Do we practice healthy self-care, even while we may be caregivers to family members? Is our self-respect non-negotiable, even when we are experiencing difficulties in our lives?Or—do we allow anxiety and fear to … [Read more...] about Are You the Loved One of an Addict? Saying NO to Manipulation
Where to turn when loving an addict
SEPTEMBER IS RECOVERY MONTH Do you know that September is Recovery Month? I think it’s amazing that a whole month has been set aside as a time to honor recovery from addiction—this shows that the times definitely are a-changin’ and that a great many more people are getting the message that recovery truly is possible. This is great for those who are struggling with addictive behaviors—from alcohol and drugs to gambling, to compulsive over-spending, to sex addiction, to Internet addiction, … [Read more...] about Attention All Loved Ones of Addicts: Let’s Come out of the Shame Closet and Recover!
Is it possible to have a healthy relationship with someone who is in active addiction? What needs to happen for that to occur? If you are in that situation, you have probably wondered about this many times. THE QUESTION OF THE DAY Several weeks ago I was interviewed on Talk Recovery radio, a new program on Vancouver’s Co-Op Radio station, dealing with addiction and recovery issues. I was honored to be chosen as their very first guest, and I had a great time talking with the interviewers about … [Read more...] about Sometimes Love Looks like “No”: When to Set and Maintain Healthy Boundaries
THE STORY I was recently interviewed on NEWS 1130 radio here in Vancouver about the very touching story that has surfaced regarding Carole James and her son’s addiction. When I initially became aware of this, my first thought was about the harrowing ordeal this family has gone through—with virtually nowhere to turn for help. Ms. James’ son Evan—now 28, clean, and sober—first began using drugs and alcohol when he was 16. At this time, Ms. James was in the process of getting her professional … [Read more...] about Carole James’ Private Struggle: The Loved One of an Addict Shares Her Story