There’s nothing wrong with doing something for someone we care about, as long as what we’re doing isn’t enabling that person to stay stuck in addiction. When we do that, our self-respect takes a hit, and we feel this inside. It’s important to ask ourselves this question: Am I trying to ‘rescue’ someone so that I can feel better, or am I wanting to help them feel their own resiliency as they learn how to do things for themselves? … [Read more...] about Are you able to put your own needs first?
Addiction and Codependency
The Changing Face of Self-Care
For those of us who grew up in dysfunctional families, practicing holistic self-care and putting our own needs first was fleeting at best. That’s because, as children, so much of our time had to be spent on staying “safe” – and this often meant that we had to focus on making others feel good. As adults, we can shift that today. When we become aware of needing to caretake someone else, we can change direction and begin to focus on ourselves so that WE can feel good. … [Read more...] about The Changing Face of Self-Care
Ask Yourself Some Important Questions
When we focus too much on the addict in our lives, we can lose ourselves in the process. Asking ourselves some deeper questions and answering them as honestly as possible can help us find ourselves again. … [Read more...] about Ask Yourself Some Important Questions
Should We Pay Our Addicted Daughter’s Rent?
My daughter has been addicted to alcohol since she was 15. My husband and I thought it was just a phase she would grow out of, but she is now 27 and her life is a total mess. We have tried to help her in every way we could think of, but nothing seems to be working. If we don’t continue to pay her rent (which is a financial hardship for us, after so many years), I’m worried she will be out on the street with nowhere to go. My husband thinks we should do this, but I just can’t bring myself to see … [Read more...] about Should We Pay Our Addicted Daughter’s Rent?
Trust Your Inner Guidance
We all have what I like to call an “inner GPS” that tells us when we are on track and when we aren’t. We can know this by the way we feel inside. It’s important for us to listen to this inner voice so that we can build up both our self-trust and our self-respect. … [Read more...] about Trust Your Inner Guidance