J. asks: How can I support my loved one's recovery without enabling their addiction? And how can I communicate effectively with my loved one about their addiction? Hi J, Those are two great questions that overlap. Let me talk a bit about enabling and the difference between enabling and helping, because they're so important. When we enable someone, especially an addict, we're doing things for them that they need to do for themselves, things that they should be doing for themselves. When we do … [Read more...] about How can I support my loved one’s recovery without enabling their addiction?
Addiction and Codependency
Should We Move to Avoid a Trigger?
LL Asks: As my adult child gets off crack, should we move to another apartment so the room where he took drugs is not familiar or a trigger? Hi LL, I’m glad you wrote to me. What I’m hearing from your question is about how you can be most supportive of your son as he tries to get off crack, and I think that it’s terrific that you want to support him. There is nothing wrong with wanting to do that. As for moving to another apartment, if this is something you can afford and you have thought … [Read more...] about Should We Move to Avoid a Trigger?
The Importance of Loved Ones of Addicts Being United
Sheila asks: My husband and I have very different approaches to helping our son with his alcoholism, and it's causing arguments and problems in our relationship. How do we come together and agree on a plan? Hi Sheila, I see this happen so many times. We rarely see a family come to us where everybody is in agreement. We usually see families where one parent is enabling an adult child—meaning that they're giving them money, doing things for them, driving them places because the child had a DUI … [Read more...] about The Importance of Loved Ones of Addicts Being United
Recognizing Signs of addiction in Employees
A.H. asks: How can employers better recognize signs of addiction in their employees? Hi A.H., Because addiction is so rampant, the first thing that employers need to do is come out of whatever denial they may be in. Instead of brushing off when an employee is acting a little strange, consider that it could be addiction. In our world today, either everyone is affected by addiction – either their own or someone else’s – or they know someone who is. Denial is no longer an outlet that we can use … [Read more...] about Recognizing Signs of addiction in Employees
Are You Filling Your Tank?
Can you recall a time when you needed to take care of yourself in some way, but instead decided to put the needs of others first? How did you explain that decision to yourself? Do you believe those you took care of ahead of yourself would have suffered if you hadn’t done that? Did you suffer as a result of not meeting your own needs? … [Read more...] about Are You Filling Your Tank?
