Good Day Candace, I need to know if it is advisable to provide a relative with her own apartment? She is still an active user. She is homeless. My thinking is to purchase a small apartment destined to be for my daughter to live in. The apartment will be in my name and I will write in my will that when I die that apartment is to be transferred to my daughter's name. What would you advise? Your input is much appreciated. Mariamanda Hi Mariamanda, This is a great question! While I think … [Read more...] about Is it advisable to provide a relative with her own apartment?
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What Should I Do About My Daughter Stealing from Me?
My 32-year-old daughter keeps stealing from me. She takes money out of my purse and steals jewellery and electronics. She uses the money from this to support her drug habit, and I feel very sad about this. She’s been living with me for the last few months because she doesn’t have a job or money, and I don’t want to see her out on the street – so I don’t know what to do. Can you help me? A.M. Hi A.M., I’m really glad you sent your question to me. I’ll start by saying that we teach people how … [Read more...] about What Should I Do About My Daughter Stealing from Me?
How Can I Make My Son Go to Rehab?
D.H. Asks: My son has been using drugs, as well as stealing and lying to us, for a lot of years now. We’ve tried to help him in every way we can because we don’t want to see him on the street or in jail, but we are feeling really tired of all of it now. How do we make him go to rehab and change his life? Hi D.H., Unfortunately, there is no way to “make” another person do anything, no matter how hard we may try. That’s because: (a) We are powerless over other people and (b) We live on a … [Read more...] about How Can I Make My Son Go to Rehab?
Boundaries on family trips
M.W. Asks: What boundaries do you suggest for family trips? I've thought about reserving my own lodging, but that can be expensive. However, staying in the same hotel room with my spouse (an active addict) takes an emotional toll and discolors my ability to enjoy my stay. So other than reserving my own room, what boundaries could I set? Thank you. Thanks for reaching out with your question. I will first ask whether you’ve thought about the possibility of not going on this particular family … [Read more...] about Boundaries on family trips
My brother needs ongoing help for past trauma
Hi Candace, I have just returned from a crisis situation that happened while on vacation in Thailand. What was supposed to be a 2.5-week focus on my physical/mental health turned into discovering my brother who lives there, was so far gone with alcohol. A 26er a day of vodka, disgusting living conditions and had many people enabling him with $$ and a very toxic Thai girlfriend. I was able to get him 3 days after I arrived on Koh Samui to a facility I could afford. It was the longest day of my … [Read more...] about My brother needs ongoing help for past trauma