The term “codependency” can mean different things to different people. Over the years, a number of authors have offered a variety of definitions for this difficult dynamic that seems to affect more people than we can imagine. My definition is a very simple one: “codependency” occurs when we put other people’s needs ahead of our own on a fairly consistent basis. In truth, when we are codependent, we are also people-pleasers who will go to virtually any lengths to avoid unpleasant conflict with … [Read more...] about Recovering from Codependency: The Truth About People-Pleasing
Articles
The Knee-bone’s Connected to the Thigh-bone: The Benefits of Healing Holistically from Addictive Behaviours
Recovering from an “addictive behaviour” requires a lot from us – we need to make sure that a number of life pieces are in place before we can be successful. Whether we are dealing with mind-altering substances like drugs and alcohol, or other mood-altering behaviours such as disordered eating, smoking, excessive internet use, gambling, over-spending or codependency in our relationships until we can think in holistic terms about our recovery we will most likely be doomed to repeat our … [Read more...] about The Knee-bone’s Connected to the Thigh-bone: The Benefits of Healing Holistically from Addictive Behaviours
Denial and Addiction: Becoming Aware of the Inner Voice that Leads to Self-Destruction
Anyone who has been around 12-Step programs for any length of time has inevitably heard the old saying “Denial is more than a river in Egypt.” Indeed, when it comes to addictive behaviours of any sort, denial is definitely a whole lot more than a slogan. It is often the underlying dynamic that keeps an addiction active, even when the addict really wants to stop the behaviour. In this newsletter, I will discuss the role of denial in addiction, and the staggering impact it can have when someone … [Read more...] about Denial and Addiction: Becoming Aware of the Inner Voice that Leads to Self-Destruction
Coming Out of Our Comfort Zones: Recovery From Addiction
I believe that every person on this planet, without exception, uses at least one addictive behavior designed to distract them from having to deal with difficult feelings and painful situations. As controversial as that statement may be for some people, I stand by it. The Most Common “Comfort Zones” In my experience, both personal and professional, I have seen this over and over again. There are a great many options we can select from in order to cover up our discomfort; the most common in our … [Read more...] about Coming Out of Our Comfort Zones: Recovery From Addiction
Allowing Discomfort: The Secret to Successful Recovery From Addictive Behaviours Challenging Your “Yeah But’s…”
You've given it a lot of thought. You know that your addiction is overwhelming your life and causing you a lot of problems. You really want to stop engaging in these self-defeating behaviours and have a better life. You're so sure you're ready, but… "It's going to be so hard!" you tell yourself. "How am I going to get through the rough times without having that substance or behaviour to fall back on?" The truth is, you're right! It will be difficult. When we have been soothing ourselves with … [Read more...] about Allowing Discomfort: The Secret to Successful Recovery From Addictive Behaviours Challenging Your “Yeah But’s…”